How to Deal with Morons: A Guide for Petty People

I want you to think of a moron in your life. One who is totally pissing you off. You know, the one who makes your blood boil at the mere thought of their face.

You know exactly who I’m taking about.

Yes.

Yes you do.

Likely this person has done something to you to cause these feelings. Maybe that something was deliberate: They sabotaged your job interview, and you didn’t get your dream job. Or maybe they started awful rumors about you.

Or maybe it wasn’t deliberate, but they are just stupid and can’t help it: They accidentally doored your brand new Mercedes. Or maybe they just insist on constantly giving their opinion on every little thing, thinking they are helping. But in reality, you didn’t ask for it.

Either way, you’re stuck in the same boat: Your blood pressure skyrockets at the mention of their name. You become your least favorite version of yourself. You daydream about what you’d LOVE to say (or do!) to them to put them in their place. Or maybe you HAVE said or done something to put them in their place.

(If you have, your cajones are way bigger than mine! I silently slaughter them with my witty and logical words. In my head. Of course. So. Tough.)

Ok. So now that I have you feeling some type of way again, how does it actually FEEL? Like, physically?

Not great. Amiright?

And your mood has probably taken a dive, too, yeah?

If you ask me, that is some pretty low-vibe shit. (I get it. I'm guilty. And just as petty.) And do you know what type of things low-vibes attract? Yep. You guessed it: More shitty shit! And you’ll notice it. All of it. That can cause a pretty downward spiral. You’ll be grumpy, pessimistic, every little thing will piss you off, and you’ll be lucky to get anywhere or get anything good in life.

Now that you’re probably thinking, ‘Great! You’ve called me out on my B.S. and annoyed me- What am I supposed to do about it? Especially since everything that moron does is NOT MY FAULT?! They’re the dummy!’

You may like my answer. You may also want to hit me. Or maybe just ignore me. But in my humble and honest opinion... At the very least, there are three steps you can take toward dealing with this crap.

(Spoiler Alert: They are NOT fun. But really, neither is anything that is for the greater good. For example: eating healthy. But we do it when we want to feel good or look hot. Even if we complain the entire time. So feel free to bitch and moan, but at least TRY...)

Step 1: Decide.

You have to decide you don’t love this boat of resentment you’re in, and being the victim of this stupid person. (See that?! You’re actually a victim here- meaning that by being like, ‘Poor me’ is actually giving them allllllll the power. We both know you don’t want that.) Decide something needs to be done.

Step 2: REFOCUS

You have to take your own power back from the idiot. This means choosing to refocus your mind. It means being a big enough person to see that whatever they are projecting onto you is just that- a projection of them. It’s their own issues. Issues that likely have nothing to do with you. (True especially in cases where they are deliberately being a jerk.)

If you can view their actions or words with this in mind, it can help you not take it SO personally! You can more easily let it slide off your shoulders. Like, ‘Poor little guy! He’s dealing with a lot. That would suck to be that dumb. It doesn’t have a thing to do with me. Hope he can get his shit together!’

Step 3: FORGIVE

Perhaps the hardest step of all. Many, many, many, many cannot complete this step, ever.

I’ll be honest: this is also not my strong suite. I can hold onto a grudge for years. I’d prefer to, actually. Because if you forgive that moron, you lose, right? And they win? Plus, I feel so tough when I can call them out on their B.S. Over. And over.

(Told you I was petty!)

For the low-vibers, yep. You lose. But to the ones who can see above it? For the ones who are purposefully raising their frequencies? The ones who are choosing to click on this blog post, read it and follow (or at least be open to trying to follow) the steps I’ve mentioned? The ones who are purposefully trying to make that nasty, gross feeling in their gut go away, and really FEEL better?

You guessed it. It’s a win.

Know why?

Because these are all steps to raising your frequency! They will help take you from low-vibe to high-vibe when dealing with that moron. We already know low-vibe attracts more low-vibe experiences.

So naturally, high-vibe brings some goooooood stuff! And think about it: if awesome stuff is flying your way, you feel amazing. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally. And it tends to keep flying your way when you’re up so high. You see the good. This is the best version of you. The one you want to present to the world. The one the world deserves to see.

You are actually forgiving them for YOUR well-being. Not theirs. (Who's the sucka NOW?!)

So. By deciding, refocusing, and forgiving the morons in your life, who actually wins again? Yep. You freaking do. (Albeit, in a weird and roundabout, almost petty way.)

I’ll take it.

And winning, by the way, is Luxuriously Dope.